THE SOPHIAN PRODUCTION TEAM
Every week, as The Sophian’s editors churn out the weekly student newspaper, their resentment towards bureaucratic processes and general existential dread grows.
Here is a list of a few festering complaints:
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It really sucks when people nitpick The Sophian even though the copy editing/layout teams are two people each that spend 9 hours per week per person on the paper (for free).
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I’m a junior, and I still haven’t managed to get a hang of doing my homework on time, eating well, sleeping and being an adult.
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The Sophian office is so far away! I walked through the rain to get there, and it was NOT FUN!
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Emails from mailer-daemon! Oh my god! I get it! I entered the email address wrong!
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Why was Mountain Day so early? I need it THIS WEEK.
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Someone just put a big stack of dining hall dishes on the free table in my house. Just take them back before we get fined. AGAIN.
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There is a to-go container sitting in my house kitchen, and it’s been there for so long that I think it might be abandoned. Would I be a jerk if I just took it? I think I’d be a jerk, but the desire to have another grab-and-go coin is so strong.
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Being over-committed. Is it really necessary to hold a leadership position in two orgs?
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I wish I were abroad, but I’m going to be here for the next three semesters. Yay Smith…
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Why is it October 25? Why can’t it be J-Term already?
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Writing papers. Even as an English major, it’s really not a fun process.
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Why are there only 24 hours in a day? I think Smith students need more to adequately get work done as well as stay healthy. @kmac get on it
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I had a chocolate croissant from Hubbard, and now I’m sad because I only had one.
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Why does the wi-fi refuse to actually function half the time? There’s been times where I’m walking through the middle of campus and it just disappears on me. Plus, eduroam won’t let me get rid of my phone lock?
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No one told me whether or not the “ghosting” in my ghosting article actually counts as ghosting. What’s the point of writing for The Sophian if strangers won’t answer your very specific questions for you?
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The copy editors are too busy writing complaints for this article to finish doing the captions.
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The layout editors are too busy writing complaints to help out the copy editors.
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The fact that I keep getting called a layout editor even though I got promoted to Associate Editor a year and a half ago.
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Wednesday nights. Is it just me or is everything always due on Thursdays?
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I’m busy from 9 a.m. to 10 p.m., yet teachers still assign 50-page readings each due the following class. Please, I want to finish my responsibilities and still have time for enjoyment.
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I hate the fact that I can’t think of anything to write for this article, even though I am complaining 24-7 regularly.
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How do I even get into eduroam?
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The fact that the new hotsmithieswhoread instagram doesn’t have more followers is honestly a tragedy.
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The Neilson construction is killing my commute across campus. If they don’t figure out another way to get around campus with a bike, I will eventually run someone over.
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I just spelled Neilson wrong in the previous complaint even though there is a sign up in the office telling us how it’s spelled. Also I’m a senior; I should know better.
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Watching my friends who are abroad thrive in cosmopolitan cities while I’m sitting here watching the cars pass from my bedroom window. Sigh, the jaded junior life.
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What do you mean my midterm is next week? What do you mean I’ve already had two midterms? I haven’t even lived here for two months? What? Huh?
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I really need to do my laundry, but I still haven’t been paid for my work. #brokecollegestudentlife #pleasesendhelp #airingmydirtylaundry
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If you’re going to smile, please be genuine.
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Trying to finish my readings for my UMass class on the B43 while the hot sun beams in my face. This is how I get headaches.
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How many vegan fillets did I eat last week? Nobody knows.
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I want a chicken tender.
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Why is all the Smith gear in the book store so sad and outdated??
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I want to see my high school friends again, but they’re all hundreds of miles away. Might be my fault for going to a college on the East Coast, but still.
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One more email from the Lazarus Center and Smith email is canceled. It’s the new Office of Student Engagement with the bedding.
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There’s so many activities I want to attend, but they’re all during the same times. What if I want to attend an event hosted by an org I’m a part of but my work is during that time??
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I wish I lived on Green Street, so that I could study in Josten all day.
